Afternoon Ramblings

The kids are napping, and Steven is putting the lasagna in the oven. It's only 2pm on a Saturday afternoon, but dinner is already checked off the to do list so I can be sure to have enough time to have everything in order for the party I am hosting tonight.

I'm excited for this evening, but my mind is sort of stuck on something I read yesterday. I often scroll through my Facebook feed, skimming over quotes that don't mean much to me, but last night one caught my attention. It still demands my attention.

People are often unreasonable and self-centered. Forgive them anyway. If you are kind, people may accuse you of ulterior motives. Be kind anyway. If you are honest, people may cheat you. Be honest anyway. If you find happiness, people may be jealous. Be happy anyway. The good you do today may be forgotten tomorrow. Do good anyway. Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough. Give your best anyway."

~Mother Theresa



So I re-read each line and think.

I've gotten pretty good at forgiving people over the years. From family members to friends to strangers. It's almost impossible for me to hold a grudge. I've tried, but they eat me up inside. As is expected in this life, people hurt us. Sometimes intentionally and sometimes unintentionally. Some people use language and name calling as their power over others, while others use actions. Some use every way possible. At the end of the day, it is my choice to react kindly. I can apologize, ask for forgiveness for my part in the situation, and from there I'm free.

Free to love and free to let go. Free of ulterior motives. I am overwhelmed with the way people have showed me grace in this lifetime. Because let's face it, we all screw up. Nothing is more humbling than when I screw up and people offer me grace in the midst of my humanness.

I want to be a grace giver not a finger pointer.

At times I have been hesitant to share good news with others because I don't want to be the reason for ugly jealousy. I know, at times, I am jealous of others, and it is a messy place to be. At the end of the day though, jealousy is a disease that each of us has to deal with. It is our human nature and our choice to let jealousy steal our joy.

So dammit, be happy. Let it show.

When I think I'm doing good by other's standards (even if it's just keeping two kids alive), it's still easy to feel I have missed the mark. Actions go unoticed and unappreciated, but they are done nonetheless. I remind myself that my actions have a ripple affect that I am unaware of. Even a smile or kind text can turn someone's day around. I want to be radiant in my goodness. I want to do my best.

I know this is so cliche, but we aren't promised tomorrow, and with all the tragedy in the world, I can't find it in me to make people feel less. No one in this world deserves any less than to be loved.

I choose love.

To everyone who I have wronged, I ask for grace. To everyone who has wronged me, I give grace.

That Mother Theresa was a wise woman, indeed.