After crying all the way home this afternoon and laying down in bed and crying more when I got home, I made this little family a big batch of chicken spaghetti (a healthy version that I must share sometime), put the kids to bed and popped open a Shiner (nothin' finer). I must say my spirits are a bit higher. However, this heart of mine is still heavy.
I'm praying for peace for everyone involved. After all, it seems more applicable than hiding in a Uhaul.
But you know me. There is still plenty to be thankful for.
Playing games of cars and dinosaurs before bed tonight. Nothing takes your mind off things like going "vroom vroom" and "rawr" a million times in ten minutes. The giggles help too, of course.
make believe princesses who have to take their tiaras off and set down their magic wands before they go potty
little boys with fresh summer haircuts (ironically it is May 2nd and in the 30's here in Texas)
And there is more still.
On Wednesday Harper was running a low fever and couldn't go to school. I thought about dropping Kinley off anyways, until it hit me. She actually makes my life easier. It's easier on me when they are both home than when she's gone. I'm thankful for this. She has reached a new stage in her life and I love it. She plays with Harper, runs upstairs and gets me diapers if I need them, always wants to help and makes me laugh constantly. I'm excited for her growth and sweet heart. I'm thankful that she's maturing.
Monday night Steven fell asleep on the couch right after the kids went to bed. Like at 7:30. He had obviously had a long day, but I didn't care. I was upset that now I had to put our sheets in the dryer and on the bed. I was upset that I had to clean the kitchen and make lunches. I packed mine and the kids' lunches and began to start cleaning. Then I realized what a selfish brat I was being. So I stopped and began to work through my feelings (don't make fun of me), and my attitude began to change. I saw this as a way to bless Steven. I made his lunch and added a sweet note to it. I cleaned the kitchen spotless. I put warm smelly good sheets on the bed. And I was happy doing it. I'm thankful for grace.
I'm thankful for Lime Ricki Swimwear. I bought my maternity swimsuit from them when I was pregnant with Harper and loved it. I decided to try out one of their tankini tops and love it too! I chose THIS ONE. Not only does it match my bikini bottoms perfectly but it fits like a glove. I feel so comfortable and dare I say, pretty, in it. I like it because it is very snug fitting. So many tankini tops are loose around the stomach and I can't stand that. Check out the website ladies. Modest and super cute swimsuits. Have one for the hubby and one for chasing little hellions around.
I'm thankful for raw Christain women writers like Alyssa from Resolved 2 Worship.
"What I know to be true is that even if I did understand all wisdom and all knowledge but do not have love, I'm nothing. (1 Cor. 13)
What I do know is that I want Him in my heart and life and I will ask Him to come over and over again because each day the need for Him to indwell me is revealed once more through my inability to love Him and others.And last but not least, I'm always thankful for a little funny. This morning it went something like this...
What my heart yearns for most is not all my questions answered and all the right words to tell my children. I yearn most for the kind of knowing that isn't the mental knowing of facts and theological correctness, but the kind of knowing that just wants to be with Him. It's truly that simple."
Me: "Good morning Sweet Girl."
Kinley: "Do you have poo poo in your mouth?"
Me: (laughing so hard) "Umm, no, I just haven't brushed my teeth yet, silly."
So here's to family gone in distance but not in heart, the imprints children leave on our lives, perfect swimsuits, blessing our husband's even when it's not effortless, women writers brave enough to share their hearts and...
mouths that smell like shit.